If you’ve ever seen the movie When Harry Met Sally, you undoubtedly remember the famous scene of Meg Ryan, um, “faking it” in the deli. (Even if you haven’t seen the movie, chances are you’ve seen this clip in one of the countless montages it’s featured in.) And, in either case, you also probably remember the “topper” line that closes the scene (delivered by the director’s mother, Estelle Reiner): “I’ll have what she’s having.”
Aside from its raunchy comedic value, this line offers great advice about relationships, business, and just about every other area of life: Rather than trying to push yourself (or your product, service, or anything else you might be trying to sell or advocate) on others, simply radiate an authentic, natural joy and love of life. Anyone in your vicinity will be drawn to you and your energy. They’ll want “what you’re having”!
This doesn’t mean that you should “fake it” (like Meg Ryan’s character or in any other way) or that you need to experience/exude orgasmic pleasure every moment of every day. It also doesn’t mean that you need to pretend that you have it all figured out, be at the pinnacle of your field, or be the ultimate “catch” in terms of a romantic relationship, business partnership, or any other area of life.
It simply means that if you are authentically filled with love, joy, personal fulfillment, and “YOU-ness,” this will naturally flow out into the world…and attract the kind of relationships (of all kinds) that you’d like to attract!
Remember, you are your always your own biggest testimonial — which can be positive, negative, or mixed depending on your energy and, most importantly, your LIFE! Your life is “Exhibit A” of how desirable (or not) whatever you’re promoting is.
If you are consistently negative, desperate, or miserable, most people are not going to want “what you’re having”! On the other hand, if you’re the embodiment of the qualities that people are seeking, they’re going to be drawn to you.
To give a somewhat superficial (but widely applicable) example: Many years ago, a woman tried to sell me a special brush designed to make your hair thicker. (At the time, I had thick, wavy hair that reached halfway down my back, so I’m not sure why she thought I might need this product, but that’s beside the point.) In any case, she was very pleasant and spent a good deal of time with me, explaining how this miracle brush worked (something to do with magnetic bristles, if I remember correctly) and the positive results it could produce.
Her explanation and sales pitch sounded great, but there was just one problem: The woman was nearly bald — with only a smattering of wispy tufts barely covering her scalp. As nice as this woman was, whatever she was doing — with the comb or anything else — clearly wasn’t helping much in this area. Needless to say, I did not “want what she was having” in the ‘do department.
Chances are, you’re not in the miracle-comb business, but you can apply this same principle to almost anything you do (or want to do):
- If you’re a life coach, is your own life an example of what your clients might want?
- If you’re a fitness trainer, nutritionist, or holistic doctor, are you healthy?
- If you’re a teacher, do you excel in the area you teach?
- If you’re looking for a loving, joyful relationship, do you exude love and joy?
In other words, are you living in such a way — personally and professionally — that others would want “what you’re having”?
By embodying what you and your potential clients or partners desire, you do yourself a couple of favors: First of all, you simply feel better. (Even if it didn’t lead to anything else, wouldn’t you just rather be radiant?) Also, this approach means that you don’t have to “sell” in the traditional sense. You don’t have to convince someone to want what you’re having. You simply live your life — enjoying your health, happiness, and success — and let the Law of Attraction connect you with the people who naturally gravitate to your energy.
I’ve found that it’s so much easier to live your life and conduct your business this way. You don’t have to be pushy or salesy or (like Meg Ryan’s “Sally” character) cause a scene. You just have to be you.
What are elements of YOU and your life that might attract others or make them say, “I’ll have what (s)he’s having”?